Much of this week was gorgeous. There was a lot of sunshine, which I really enjoy. I like to imagine the rays of the sun as God's radiant presence, sort of based off of Numbers 6:24-26, "The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace." I'll spread out of my arms just to bask in the beauty even more. People who see me probably think I'm weird, but I view it as worship. In addition to the sunshine being a blessing to me this week, the signs of fall also blessed me. It's just so much fun to go on walks and see the pictures that God paints using His creation. There's something beautiful about scattered leaves on a path in the woods. Until the past two years, I've never really appreciated this type of beauty, but I'm so glad that God has shown it to me because it's one more thing that I can love Him with.
Speaking of loving God, I don't think that I will ever come to the point on this earth where I will love God as much as I should. In fact, I don't even know if I will love Him as much as I should when I get to heaven and I am in His presence forever. Even if I were able to love Him to full capacity, I still think that my love for Him would be pale in comparison to His love for me. Even with this realization, I do not think it is wasteful to try to love God as much as possible on this earth. In fact, it's a joy. I was listening to a Focus on the Family broadcast, and it mentioned the Greek word for "seek" in Matthew 6:33. It is zeteo, which means "to crave." I do not think that I "crave" God as much as I should; however, I feel like He has been putting those sort of cravings in my heart slowly but surely. At the end of my quiet times with Him, I'm just thinking to myself, "Oh man, we were just getting started." I think these cravings for more of God also come as a result of asking God to show me if I could really spend 8 hours a day (like some Christians in the past did) with Him alone. I think He's answering that question with a "yes," and it makes sense, for one day, I will forever be in His presence. (Not that God isn't already present on the earth, but I feel that God reveals Himself in a special way during quiet times.)
This week, I have really struggled with how impatient of a person I am. I dislike not seeing results. Even as I am being ministered to here at JBU, I like to look at my time here as one of ministry as well. I enjoy listening to people talk about the challenges, trials, and decisions that they are going through. It makes me feel like I am needed and that I am important (I know that probably sounds wrong since people in ministry really aren't supposed to think that way, but I think it's probably a natural human tendency.) Yet, this week, it seemed as if no one needed a listening ear. I felt like I wasn't really doing anything for God. Then God basically challenged me to be faithful in prayer for the people and situations that I do know about.
I enjoyed this quote this week, also from the Focus on the Family broadcast that I listened to: "God gave us food so that we could consume it, but it was never meant to consume us."
"Delays of answers are not denials."
Words I learned this week: braggadocio, masticate, Brogdingnagian, imprecate, salient, cogitation
Have a blessed week! Take the time to seek the Lord, because He is definitely worth it!
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