Week in Review: December 3-9

I sin over and over again. Over and over again I sin. I cannot escape from my sins. Even when it seems that I have genuinely repented of my sins, I fall back into them. This was the way it was with me this week. My love for my first love felt diminished this week. Even so, "[God's] love never fails. It never gives up. It never runs out on me." That just amazes me. Please pray that God would light the fire in me again. I hate feeling dead.

At this time, I am basically over my cold, but having it was humbling, which I guess I needed. It was frustrating to have diminished sleep due to factors unrelated to my cold when I was trying to be intentional about getting plenty of rest. It served to show me that even when I think I am, I am not in control. God is.

Thankfully, towards the end of the week, I was able to get more sleep, and I remember having a lot of dreams. I don't remember a lot of them, of course; however, I have a vague memory of one dream where someone said something along the lines of, "That's the frustrating thing. People often focus on the things that are not important. They forget the goal: 'Go and make disciples.'" I just thought that that was a good reminder for all of us.

Finally, on Tuesday night this week, my hall had a worship night with our brother hall. Some of my voice had decided to go on vacation due to my cold, but I figured that I would go and just worship in spirit. The funny thing is, I don't think I even worshiped in spirit. For much of the time, I was thinking, "Oh, I hope no one thinks poorly of me because I am not singing. I hope they don't think I love God any less than they do or that I'm some pagan." So I think my attempts to worship in spirit failed, unfortunately.

Have a good week, everyone! About five more days until I'm back in cold Michigan!

Week in Review: November 26- December 2

Hello, everyone. This past week was filled with many times when I was reminded of my sin. It seemed that in everything that I did, there was always something ugly in my heart showing up. I gave in to fleshly desires to sleep in (when I had already had enough sleep) and to eat junk food without restraint. I placed things above God-- idolatry, in one word. I was aware of jealousy in my heart as I saw certain guys whom I have crushes on enjoying the company of other girls. Finally, (and I don't think that this was even everything that I fell short in this week) I skipped church this morning in the name of, "Oh, I'm sick," instead of admitting that it was because I have homework this morning. Basically, I neglected to walk by the Spirit.The good thing in all of this is God's grace. He is so merciful and gracious to me! He has already forgiven me for how I sinned this week.

One thing I noticed about the song "Here I am to Worship" this week was the pattern of the lyrics. Before each chorus, which says, "Here I am to worship/ Here I am to bow down/ Here I am to say that You're my God/ You're altogether lovely/ Altogether worthy/ Altogether wonderful to me," it talks about Christ and His work on the cross. For instance, one verse says, "King of all days/ Oh, so highly exalted/ Glorious in heaven above/ Humbly You came/ To the earth You created/ All for love's sake became poor," and then the song continues on with the chorus. Notice that worship comes out of one's heart because of who God is and not because of one's circumstances.

This week, God answered one of my prayers in the form of a dream, which I thought was really cool. I don't think that has ever happened to me before.

I already mentioned this on facebook, but this week I realized that I am a part of a consistent friend group, and, for that, I am thankful. It has kept me out of other trouble this semester. It's not that I didn't have any friends before. It's just that I didn't know who I would ask to go to certain fun events with. Now, I have that group of friends, and I am blessed because of it.

Words I learned: vitriolic, enclaves, regnant, senescent

"Responsibility calls us to action and tests us. It reveals our character, our caliber, and our commitment."

"In the early morning hours
'Twixt the night and day,
While from earth the darkness passes
Silently away;

Then it's sweet to talk with Jesus
In your bedroom still--
For the coming day and duties
Ask to know His will.

Then He'll lead the way before you,
Laying mountains low;
Making desert places blossom,
Sweet'ning sorrow's flow

Do you want a life of triumph,
Victory all the way?
Then put God in the beginning
Of each coming day."