I sin over and over again. Over and over again I sin. I cannot escape from my sins. Even when it seems that I have genuinely repented of my sins, I fall back into them. This was the way it was with me this week. My love for my first love felt diminished this week. Even so, "[God's] love never fails. It never gives up. It never runs out on me." That just amazes me. Please pray that God would light the fire in me again. I hate feeling dead.
At this time, I am basically over my cold, but having it was humbling, which I guess I needed. It was frustrating to have diminished sleep due to factors unrelated to my cold when I was trying to be intentional about getting plenty of rest. It served to show me that even when I think I am, I am not in control. God is.
Thankfully, towards the end of the week, I was able to get more sleep, and I remember having a lot of dreams. I don't remember a lot of them, of course; however, I have a vague memory of one dream where someone said something along the lines of, "That's the frustrating thing. People often focus on the things that are not important. They forget the goal: 'Go and make disciples.'" I just thought that that was a good reminder for all of us.
Finally, on Tuesday night this week, my hall had a worship night with our brother hall. Some of my voice had decided to go on vacation due to my cold, but I figured that I would go and just worship in spirit. The funny thing is, I don't think I even worshiped in spirit. For much of the time, I was thinking, "Oh, I hope no one thinks poorly of me because I am not singing. I hope they don't think I love God any less than they do or that I'm some pagan." So I think my attempts to worship in spirit failed, unfortunately.
Have a good week, everyone! About five more days until I'm back in cold Michigan!
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